Join us on our adventures across the United States

with 3 rugrats, an army guy and me...

oh and don't forget Kosmo :)

December 13, 2013

Life Lessons

Sometimes as a parent you hope and pray that the life lessons you are trying to teach your babies are sticking.  Over the last year and a half the lesson for our family has been consistent.  Consistently that everything happens for a reason and that God has a plan for every event and that we should not worry over everything and just trust him.  This is our way of making it through deployments sanely and this last deployment brought it to the front.  It was a daily discussion in our house. This last deployment they were old enough to understand this idea and truly live by it.  It is the only way we made it through this roller coaster of a PCS from Kansas because only God knew what was going to happen with us because we sure had NO idea :).

It is easy to forget when things are going good and not remember when things aren't going the way you want them too.  Well JT just learned this lesson again and is a good reminder for all of us.  He wrestled all season and did a great job of switching from Jitz to wrestling.  He was finally getting comfortable with the wrestling rules and style and was preparing to have serious wrestle offs to make the state team.  Then came Thanksgiving :)...he of course breaks his hand blocking a move that normally would do nothing. Fast forward a couple weeks and he is done wrestling for the Middle School due to not being able to compete in wrestle offs.  In the mean time, he has the opportunity to play with 8th grade band at festival which requires him bringing home his instrument (not an easy task on the bus and one that Stephanie says I am never allowed to make him do LOL).  This lesson has officially sunk in because he has realized that by him not being able to be on the MS team he now has time to 1.  Bring home his baritone and practice, 2.  go to jitz twice a week (which is his true love and something he truly needs in his life) and 3. he will still be able to wrestle twice a week with USA and I can fit my school in around all their schedules by this happening. 

I am so thankful that one lesson we are trying to teach has officially sunk in.  Instead of being super upset about not being on the MS wrestling team he turned around and said "Its ok because there is a reason for it."  Never in a million years would I have imagined my 12 year old to tell me it's all good because there is a reason because I wouldn't have been able to do everything and you wouldn't have been able to take your late classes as easy.  Praise God that my children are truly learning to depend on him and not let life's roller coaster ride get the best of them at an early age. 

December 11, 2013

Time to get back on track...

Well it has been FOREVER AGAIN...but it is time to become a little more accountable and document this journey as time is flying and so many memories are happening. The last deployment brought so many life successes and so may new friends and so many changes, but then PCS happened. PCS...when we hear that word it presents so many brings a complexity to life that unless you have experienced you really NEVER understand...We knew where we were going, were excited it was Dahlonega. But the roller coaster ride have to say goodbye to their friends from the last three years. The two older kids were at an age where it broke their hearts. JT thank goodness has his friend still close by due to them retiring (only 8hrs) but Savannah (who has a really hard time making good girl friends) had to leave Brianna. This was the hardest thing I have ever had to make her do and it still brings tears to my eyes to this day. Thank goodness we went home but this was not so good either began the downward spiral of eating habits and workout habits. We had a ton of functional fitness (aka hauling wood from the mountains LOL) but lots of down time too. Then came the time to move to GA. Everyone had a bit of an adjustment. We got here on a Monday, signed for our house on Wednesday, household goods came on Monday, kids started jitz on Monday...then school on Friday. In this process I was job hunting and found a job, but this turned out to be not such a good thing as the hours were very rough on us. Life just seemed to get in the way of eating right and working out...what was the priority for ME was put back on the back burner again.
 During my journey from the beginning at 210lbs to 170 lbs while Josh was gone I had so many people message and ask how I did it...message and tell me they had hit the gym because of me and because of this I realized I need to get back on track and become healthy again and show my kids that it is ok to fail but you just have to keep trying. .This was when we left Kansas. 

Well now it is two steps back and the continuation of the journey..  So now at 185 and 10 steps back on the Cross Fit scale it is time to document this journey somewhere other than Facebook. 

 That way people can have the option to read or not LOL.  Not everyone will want to see all my food and read about all my crazy goals met like last time so this time it will be back to my blog...well along with all the fun stuff that is in store with sports, 15 credits next semester, Josh going off to classes and everything else that happens with our family (AKA broken bones lol)!!!   So here we go! Back to paleo and back to Allie's killer workouts...just without her :) 

September 10, 2012

Deployments are...

I was looking up a picture on here a few days ago and read my blog from April...God has some HUGE plans for this deployment....boy was I right.  This deployment has had more action packed into the last 4 months.  It has brought tears of happiness and tears of sorrow, tears of frustration and tears of absolute relief.  Yep this deployment has brought me to tears more time in 4 months than I think I have been in tears in the last 4 years.

Deployments are NEVER easy...deployments are RARELY fun....deployments are NOT my idea of the greatest way to spend months at a time...but deployments CAN bring changes for the better...they CAN bring absolute joy in moments...they CAN teach us so many things that the civilian world will never have the chance to learn.

After being married for 12 years I have learned so much about my best friend and husband during this deployment than I could have ever imagined.  He has brought me to tears of laughter so many times over the last 4 months and I couldn't be more thankful for him.  God's plan to bring us together even closer as a couple is one of the GREATEST blessings I could have ever imagined.  This deployment has brought so many blessings and I cherish every single one of them.  That is not saying that it hasn't been without its hardships.  There have been times when I wonder if I am going to make it...there have been times when I wish my Uncle Ed lived around the corner so I could just sit in his arms and cry...there have been times when I have laid awake at night with worry over his safety...but because of this deployment I have learned that those times when I think I am not going to be able to do another 4 months...
“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever” (Psalm 73:26)
I have learned that when I just want to sit and cry in my Uncle's arms...
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
I have learned that when I am worrying...
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).

I wasn't lying when I said he had plans for this adventure.  Most of his plans have definitely revolved around making sure I have to lean on him.  And by being put into situations where I have no choice, I have found it is so much easier to just trust him even when it seems COMPLETELY opposite from what I think I need and want.  From this craziness of a deployment I have been blessed to find some amazing friends that I would never have met, I have learned what my children are truly capable of (besides driving me crazy), I have gotten the privilege to stand alongside some amazing people and most of all have learned the hard lesson of sometimes I have to put me first and just say NO! For those of you that know me know that saying NO is next to impossible...but I am learning.  I have said NO a lot in the last few weeks and am enjoying having a little breathing room because of it (which will soon stop due to fitting in some time for me to get smoked LOL).  

For the kids it has taught them the lesson of patience and understanding and lessons that don't always come easy. JT says the best lesson that he has learned is to make all his friends have a special knock....that started because of an incident that took place this summer and as we were waiting on news they kept knocking on the door...which we all know can make your heart drop now all kids have a special knock LOL...he says that was the BEST idea ever because now he doesn't have to get up to go see if its for him, he just knows LOL....gotta love the laziness in that child!!!

Best of all, I have learned that my husband is an amazing man.  He is more than I could have ever imagined and I can't wait until our family returns to full strength!

I have decided though that it is time to blog the rest of this deployment, so prepare yourself to jump on this roller coaster!!!

April 01, 2012

Deployment Thoughts

On Tuesday, I will have the opportunity to speak at the Quarterly Resiliency Forum for our battalion about something very dear to my heart. Kids!!! We as adults can cope and we as adults understand our feelings more than kids so it is an honor to be able to speak on kids and how we can help them cope with deployment. Here is my draft for what will hopefully give a few someones some ideas to make it through the next nine months.

Hey guys. My name is Ami Phines and my hubby will be going on this deployment too. I am here today to just give some ideas on how to help the kids get through the deployment. There is a lot of talk on help if we as adults need it, but hasn’t been discussed much on what to do with the kids. I wanted to pass on some ideas that we have picked up on through the years. But first I want you all to watch this….

This is a video of my hubby reading to my kids. This may surprise some of you in this room because if you know my husband you know he most definitely is not a big old softy and if you are a scout DO NOT expect any of this to ever show up to any of you. But realizing that he is leaving behind our kids for a good chunk of time, he knows he has a responsibility as a parent to do things BEFORE he leaves to stay connected to them and make that transition as smooth as possible.

Helping kids cope with deployment doesn’t start when your soldier actually is gone. It needs to start now with preparing them for what is to come. Depending on the level of understanding, depends on what you can tell them. How and what you tell them is different for every family. We tell our kids everything from location to job to risk, but I know many people aren’t comfortable with their kids knowing exactly what is going on and so that information will be different for everyone depending on what you want them to know. You do need to understand that the younger ones aren’t going to understand how long the deployment is going to be because their sense of time is non-existent and so having tools to use is very important to help them. This is where some of the tools I will talk about come into play. The soldier leaving needs to make sure to spend quality time with them and not start to pull away from them. If you have every experienced a deployment before you know that before the soldiers actually leave there comes a time where they will start to pull away. This is the time that it is so very important to realize that is happening and make an effort to stay attached to the kids. The spouse would be nice too, but we can comprehend what is happening whereas the kids will be even more confused and hurt and compound what emotions are going to take place. Make sure you take the time to make memories in the next few weeks that will help those kids to remain connected to you though out the deployment and make redeployment that much easier.

· After the soldiers leave, those of us left behind are left to carry on the load of both parents. How we react to the separation will project onto the kids. For us we have a timeframe. We give ourselves 48 hours to be emotional if I need to, eat junk food watch movies and be a bum. After that it is time to suck it up and it is up to me to set the example. If I am falling apart, my kids will fall apart and my husband won’t be able to concentrate completely on the task at hand. If I am holding strong then my kids will hold strong, Josh knows that I have things under control and his focus over there can be 100% and his job and safety will be that much better for it. Kids will try anything and everything while they are gone. When they were younger of course they tried the “I miss Daddy and that’s why I cut my sisters hair” routine where everything they did wrong was because they missed Dad and now we are into the what can I get away with since Dad is gone. To the Dad is gone and that’s why I did it, your response should be “Yes I am sure you do miss Dad but guess what…that is no excuse to make a poor choice and your consequence is still the same.” (and in reality for us it is much better than if Dad was here and they know it) They need to know that just because your spouse is gone it doesn’t mean you give in because they are gone or you are going to be in for a LONG deployment of mind games in which you won’t win. By keeping things consistent and keeping a routine you are giving them stability in a situation in which they have no control. The consistency is the key to making sure that they don’t see what they can get away with for long. They will test, they will push but keeping those boundaries is important. Now with all this said it does not mean that I don’t have breakdowns, because I do. It is healthy, it is going to happen, but there is a constructive way to deal with it. Do they see me cry? Sure sometimes but not all the time. Is it ok for them to cry and miss them…most definitely so long as it doesn’t become an excuse to not take out the trash or go to bed.

· Everyone needs two people during the deployment…one you call when you wake up in the morning and think “I am done”. You call and they tell you guess what…your big girl panties are in the dryer…get them on and deal with it and it will be ok. The other person is the one you can depend on to be there at a moment’s notice. If I stop by Lindsay’s house and say here are my kids I am checking out for an hour and getting a pedicure she will say ok see you in an hour with no questions asked. You all have access to 16 free hours a month in childcare! USE can use a center or an FCC provider. It will help you to reset and stay fresh and give yourself time for yourself. It makes you able to handle those temper tantrums that much easier. As much as that sounds like I am telling you how to cope instead of the kids, that is one of the most important keys to helping the kids get through it. If you are mentally sound, your kids will be ready to go and a positive and strong attitude will facilitate a much easier deployment.

· As we all know, when there is only one adult to cook for (this does not apply to those of us with teenagers and pre teens and we can’t keep enough food in the house) it is sometimes hard to cook healthy for just us and the kids. But believe it or not, the healthy eating is important to a successful deployment by keeping things “normal” and keeping their bodies healthy which in turn makes for more consistent and better attitudes.

· For those of us with older kids, this probably isn’t your first and you are probably well prepared and know that open communication is the key. The fun things can still happen but since they grasp the concepts of time and deployment, open communication and ensuring they know you are there for them is the most important coping skill.

· Now for the fun stuff! When most kids hear deployment if they have done it, they think UGH. But they don’t have to think UGH. Make it fun! Make new memories that happen only during deployments or separations. Find something that you and the kids love to do or steal an idea from a friend or steal some of what we do. Every deployment has brought us a new thing to add. The first deployment brought books on tape, daddy bears, Friday night living room night, and the daddy dolls and some serious travelling. The second deployment brought books on video, daddy bears, trash can countdowns, Friday night living room nights, skittle jars and two moves across country just us! This deployment brings everything from the second deployment but now we are upping the fun a little with ice cream for breakfast on Saturdays and some serious training and travelling with jiu jitsu. We tried the ice cream during NTC and I can say the fact that my kids were bummed he was coming home already tells me it worked. By making the deployment fun and doing things that ONLY happen when he is gone has given my kids something positive to look forward to instead of just dreading missing him.

· Now to explain some of the fun ways to introduce to your kids to make this upcoming deployment as fun as it can be.

o Trash can countdown: I found that when they were little days were too overwhelming to countdown so instead we counted down trash days. I made a chart of trashcans and every time we took the trash to the curb we crossed it off. I made some with 38 trash cans (b/c I always plan for the worst and unexpected) and there are copies in the back you are more than welcome to take.

o As you saw I had Josh read books to the kids while I video-taped before the last deployment. They can be your child’s favorite books or books that pertain to the deployment. Ours have always been We’re Going On A Bear Hunt, Daddy Promises (which is a book about A Father’s promise to take care of his child and is Christian based), and Daddy All Day Long which is a book about how much Owen and his Daddy love each other. These were just reminders to them that he still loved them and thought about them while he was gone.

o Daddy Bears many of you may know about. Ours are no longer bears but bears, monkeys and puppies. They are just build a bears with a message to your child. When they were younger, right before Josh left he would hug and kiss them over and over and over. That way at night or when they were sad they could always get a hug and a kiss from Dad because the bear was holding onto them for them. They always got a hug and a kiss before bed along with super tucks.

o We do Friday night living room night. We all sleep in the living room, make popcorn, and watch movies and TV. There is no set bedtime that night and that is the ONLY night of the week they stay up late. Even if they are little tiny you can still do something fun like this.

o Skittle Jars: The kids all decorate their own jar however they want with paints and stickers. We add on stickers because after all having 300+ skittles is going to be a disaster and for little ones is very frustrating. I do one month of skittles at a time and remove a sticker everytime they are gone. You can use any candy you want for this, we just like to do skittles.

o For the younger kids, Daddy/Mommy Dolls are a great tool to use. A picture of their parent on a doll for them to have. These can be found at

o Flat Daddies and Flat Mommies are another useful tool for some. Having a life size picture of Dad or Mom helps some kids cope with long term separations. You can order these from

o The new one for us is ice cream for breakfast on Saturdays. I wasn’t sure how this one would work but it is AMAZING when you think of it as my kids did. I was informed that it wasn’t enough because it was ONLY 36 Saturdays and so ONLY 36 ice cream sundaes before their dad comes home. When you look at it like that, this 9 months is gonna fly!

· Most important. You can NEVER give enough of those hugs and kisses, I love you’s and high fives enough while they are gone. They are kids, they are facing things they can’t control and in many cases can’t comprehend. They will have tantrums (from little tiny to the older and way smarter than we are age) but they NEED that reassurance that you love them and are there for them.

Only a short while...

And things have changed so drastically in our family! God has some HUGE plans for this deployment I think and is preparing us for what is to come. I am finished with FCC full time and am just subbing for now. I am looking forward to hopefully getting into the classroom sometime in the near future but with a deployment looming and school to finish who knows what is going to happen!

The kids have started soccer, jiu jitsu and running club! We are going to be so very very busy! I cant wait to see where life is going to take us now!!!

February 19, 2012

A Typical Week Of Play!

As an FCC Provider I am responsible for many kids throughout the day. I currently have 5 besides my own three and others that float in and out. In this life where kids are expected to grow up so fast, I am more concerned with letting the kids be kids and play and learn through their experiences. Our weeks are so very packed full of fun from blocks and dramatic play to outside time and circle times full of silly songs and actions and of course some amazing books! But along with these day to day activities I try to throw in some fun and messy stuff!!!

Here was our last week (which was only 4 days LOL)

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A little pink playdough with red glitter was made and played with for Valentines Day!

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Just a little light table play with water beads.

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Some fun Snow Candy (Maple syrup and butter boiled and then poured over snow)

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Some Popcorn Kernel Painting!!!

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A tent sounded fun to them which then evolved into this....

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Mining for gold and jewels (depending on which kid you asked :p)

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Just a little puff painting taking place during the popcorn painting (we had 10 kids here that day LOL)

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Some bleeding tissue paper art which inevitably stained my counters and tables into those beautiful colors too!
And of course we had to end the week with a beautiful day outside playing in puddles!

Through all of this so many lessons were learned that I couldn't even begin to "teach"...instead I let them learn them as they go and get the pleasure of playing like a kid and learning lessons of my own right along with them (like only straight bleach takes out the tissue paper stains LOL).

February 18, 2012


It has been over a year since I blogged. Between school, work, kids and life I just didn't have the time! I have decided that it is time to start again though. We have so many changes and adventures upcoming and keeping track of them all will be an adventure in itself!

One of the upcoming adventures is explained in this picture.

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Anyone that is involved in our lifestyle knows what those colors mean. It means another separation, another stint as a single mom, another time for tears to fall. But they also mean so much fun, so many new memories made, and so many new lessons to be learned!!!!

For us a deployment brings on new challenges, new ideas, and of course a time for growth as a family and as individuals. Many of you see the major things on FB but this is a place for all those little things that make us, us and make us the Phines family.

Now that NTC is in progress we have already started our adventures.
Our first deployment seven years ago started living room night! It is so much easier now that they actually watch a whole movie and snuggle instead of me watch a movie while they play like toddlers :) The second deployment brought in the trash can countdown, the skittle jar, and the new adventure every weekend. We of course did the trash can countdown even if it was only a few...the skittle jars are being decorated and the new adventures have to wait until basketball and soccer are over (well those are an adventure in themselves). This deployment we are introducing a new activity to make our lives a little more enjoyable!
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I mean who wouldn't want ice cream for breakfast on Saturdays!!!

So as we start this blog again, be sure to stay tuned for all our adventures from deployment to FCC to sports and our visits all over the western US that are upcoming!

January 10, 2011


Well it is January and we finally have snow. I remember last winter we moved to Montana in December! Of course we came to snow and by the time Josh came home in May for R/R guess what!!! We still had snow!!! I remember thinking that UGH I am SOOO sick of the snow!!! We were just ready for summer and the lake! Well here we are a year later and we are all so happy to have snow again. There is just something about watching snow fall from the sky that I find relaxing.

Of course I wake up this morning and no school! Then I find out NO EXTRA KIDS!!! WOOHOOO day off for all of us. We all slept in and snuggled and watched some CSI. Then it was time to jump out of bed, grab the snow-gear and head outside for some wintery fun! So glad that I thought ahead and ordered the kids stuff on clearance. I did find out that JT and Savannah REALLY need new BOGS so that is going to be taken care of today :)

It was surprising to me how many kids were not outside! At home the first snow of the year brings EVERYONE out to play and not just for 5 minutes. Kids spend hours out in the snow and come inside and warm up and then head back out. I am so glad that my kids have learned to love and enjoy the cold crisp winter conditions and have found that no matter what fun can be had outside.
Kosmo and I joined them and we had a great time! Kosmo was so happy to play! He chased snowballs, rolled all around and acted like he was a puppy again. The kids really got to giggling at him and his silly antics.

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Then of course it was time for some good old Snow Ball!!!!!!!

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January 01, 2011


Happy New Year to you all! I hope that 2011 brings you all wonderful and fun adventures. I know that for us we have an exciting move, but that also means those sad goodbyes. We will have a double dose as the kids and I head to Montana first before Georgia but it will all be worth it!!!!

Today we start off the New Year with total relaxation. The kids go back to school this week, Josh goes back to work and the kids return full-time! Hopefully in the next couple of weeks we will have great fun adventures to share!